by Jenn |
Season 9 audition showed up in Atlanta, Georgia, the birthplace of Ryan Seacrest. The guest judge was Mary J. Blige, empress of soul, and a 9 time Grammy winner. She didn’t hold back when she laughed at the poor, talent-lacking performers, even having to fake being upset and crying at one point to attempt to hide her uncontrollable laughter. Watching her, it was difficult to tell if she liked the audition or not because of the smug, bored look on her face.
The best part of the Atlanta auditions came at the end of the day on day 2 when General Larry Platt, 62, from Atlanta, GA. He had everyone singing his catchy, personally written song, “Pants on the Ground.” This adorable elder was perhaps poking fun at the younger generation who wear their “pants on the ground, looking like a fool with your pants on the ground, gold in your mouth, hat turned sideways, pants hit the ground…” The song has already hit Youtube and been Twittered like crazy! Unfortunately, the age limit on American Idol is 28, otherwise he would have taken the whole show! He even attempted a bad version of break dancing while finishing his tune. Viewers are going to have this song stuck in their heads when the awake in the morning! General Platt had a room full singing his ditty, even Randy Jackson was dancing and singing his lyrics! Props to you General for creativity!
Pants on the Ground
Back to day one, we met Keai Johnson, 26, from Memphis, TN. She won Miss Congeniality at the Miss America competition. She belted out, “My Heart Will Go On,” Celine Dion. She added her own originality and won the judges over. Simon said, “I like you” and with 4 yes’, she was through to Hollywood.
Later in the day, Jermaine Sellers, of Joliet, IL, was introduced. This sweet church boy won the hearts of the judges by singing, “What if God Was One of Us,” by Joan Osborne. He gave a great interpretation of the song. He is definitely someone to watch out for. Sellers had the judges digging it and swaying in their seats. They said he had the best vocals of all the cities!
The last audition of day one was by Vanessa Wolfe, 19. From the tiny town of Vonore, TN, this little country girl finds fun in jumping off bridges into water…the only thing to do for fun in her town. She’s never even been on a airplane. With obvious nervousness, she surprised the judges and was through with 4 yes’ but will she be able to handle the pressure of the fast-paced big city?
The bad for day one began with Dewone Robinson, 27, from Atlanta, who wrote his own song. Note to people writing their own songs for Idol, don’t write a duet that required both a girl and guy singing! Robinson took on both parts, beginning with the girls part. He attempted his pathetic attempt 3 times before they finally kicked him out. Kara put it politely when she said, “Oh please God!” begging him to stop. Surprisingly though, he was not the only man singing like a woman. A few clips of men with high pitched voices crossed our screens before the end of the day.
On the same pathetic note, we witnessed Christy Marie Agronow, 25, a TV producer from Atlanta attempt a rendition of Pat Benatar’s, “Love is a Battlefield.” Besides being WAY too perky, her singing was terrible! So, no, she didn’t make it through.
Day 2 began with Jesse Hamilton, 26, from Anniston, AL. This poor guy was so bad but such had a sweet personality that you could help but feel his pain. He declared that no one had ever heard him sing other than his mom. He was going to sing Garth Brooks’, “The River,” but froze and forgot the words. Randy suggested singing another of Brooks’ song, but it came out sounding like a goat singing. Mary J. Blige took no pity on him, laughing so hard she was crying. Poor guy.
When Mallorie Haley, 20, from Winters, SD, stood singing a nice version of, “Take Another Little Piece of My Heart,” Blige couldn’t have looked more bored and annoyed but, it turns out, she liked Haley. Simon said she was, “fearless.” Haley has a good look, cute and sexy.
Blige didn’t understand when Holly Harden, 20, from Rockmart, GA walked into the audition dressed like a human guitar, even with guitar sunglasses! This charming girl with a southern bell accent wowed the other judges. She received 3 yes’ from Kara, Randy, and Simon, but Mary “just didn’t understand it” and would have said no….guess she couldn’t get past the look. Harden has a great personality, Randy called her “hilarious,” and Kara called her a “ballsy girl.”
And then there is Antonio ‘Skii Bo Ski’ Wheeler. Is this guy for real? It’s not that he was a bad singer, because she was actually surprisingly decent, but he had ‘American Idol’ shaved in his hair, missed spelled his name on his shirt, and made absolutely no sense when speaking. He sang “Grape Vine” and did a nice, soulful job but then he opened his mouth and said, “I’m like the Dollar Store, even with the Dollar Store, you can have everything you want in that one package and it don’t cost you more than a dollar.” Translation, please, anyone? Skii Bo Ski actually made it to Hollywood with 3 yes’ and a no from Simon.
Annoying little girls were next. Carmen Turner, 19, (the blond one) and Lauren Sanders, 18, (the brunette) are BFF’s! OMG! How freaking annoying. Both are from Baxley, GA. They came up the elevator to the judges together, Lauren performed first. Her attempt at singing quiet and boring. Then Carmen began and, wow, she actually did a good job! Thank goodness the judges said no to Lauren and separated these annoying wanna-be barbie dolls.
According to Randy, “a singing police officer is hot, dude!” Bryan Walker, 25, from Sevierville, TN is just that! At first glance, one would not expect to hear a good singing voice come out of that boy. He was great and someone to look forward to this season.
While Walker had good energy, Lamar Royal, 20, from Goldsboror, NC had a lot of negative energy. Going up to his audition, he claimed he would respect the judges opinions and loves constructive criticism…yeah, right. He did an almost decent job at Seal’s, “Kiss From a Rose,” but he painfully yelled more than sang and had bad pitch. Underneath the yelling and within his many other attempts to let the judges hear his voice, there was some potential in there. When the judges attempted to tell him that he wasn’t bad, he would interrupt them, sing more, and snap back at them. So much for loving constructive criticism! He wouldn’t listen to a word the judges said in their attempts to help him. Eventually, security was called and they had to remove the menace. As he was being escorted out, he yelled, “I wish Paula was here!” and cursed up a storm. Really, dude? Settle down.
Others through to Hollywood:
- Miriam Lemnouni, 25, from Atlanta, GA.
- Noel Reese, 16, from Sophia, NC.
- Tisha Holland, 18, from Riverdale.